10 Reasons| How to Handle Conflict in the Church Biblically​

Conflict in the church is unavoidable—but how to handle conflict in the church biblically is what sets thriving ministries apart. With 75% of pastors facing significant disputes, the stakes are high.

How to Handle Conflict in the Church Biblically​

How does the Bible say to handle conflict in the church? The Bible gives clear guidelines for handling conflict within the church.

In Matthew 18:15-17, Jesus teaches us to address conflict directly with the individual involved, keeping the matter private.

If that doesn’t work, the next step is to bring a trusted witness, and if necessary, involve church leadership. Ultimately, the goal is restoration, not punishment.

Biblical Principles for Resolving Conflict

Conflict is inevitable in people’s relationships, including within spiritual communities.

However, the Bible provides profound guidance on how to address and handle disagreements in a way that fosters reconciliation and unity.

Jesus’ teachings in Matthew 5:23-24 and Matthew 18:15 offer practical, actionable principles for navigating conflicts with humility, love, and a commitment to restoration.

Jesus emphasizes that an open conflict hinders worship and spiritual growth:

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First, go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”

Here, Jesus stresses that reconciliation should take precedence over religious rituals. It highlights the priority God places on restored relationships.

Uncertain conflict creates spiritual barriers. To worship God sincerely, believers must actively pursue peace with others.

Addressing Conflict Directly (Matthew 18:15)

Matthew 18:15 provides a clear step-by-step process for handling disputes:

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.”

This approach emphasizes private confrontation aimed at restoration rather than public accusation or division.

Conflict resolution should be direct, discreet, and driven by love, with the ultimate goal of reconciliation.

Actionable Steps for Resolving Conflict

Take Initiative

Whether the fault lies with you (Matthew 5) or the other party (Matthew 18), take the first step.
Delaying reconciliation can lead to bitterness, misunderstanding, and division.
Practical Tip: If someone has wronged you, approach them humbly and promptly to discuss the issue.

Prioritize Privacy

Address the issue directly with the individual before involving others (Matthew 18:15).
Avoid gossiping or sharing grievances with uninvolved parties, as this can harm reputations and relationships.

If the first conversation doesn’t resolve the conflict, seek mediation from a trusted leader or neutral party.

Cultivate Humility and Forgiveness

Approach reconciliation with a humble attitude, acknowledging your own faults (Matthew 7:3-5).
Forgiveness is central to conflict resolution, as emphasized in Colossians 3:13:
“Bear with each other and forgive one another… Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Pray for a forgiving heart and strive to view the situation from the other person’s perspective.

Follow a Biblical Process for Escalation

If private efforts fail, Jesus outlines further steps in Matthew 18:16-17:

Step 1: Bring one or two witnesses to mediate.
Step 2: Involve church leadership if necessary.
Step 3: Treat the unrepentant individual as an outsider, but with hope for future restoration.

Ensure each step is handled with love, respect, and the goal of reconciliation.

Spiritual Benefits of Resolving Conflict Biblically

10 Things that Cause Conflict in Church

1. Leaders with different approaches to governance and decision-making can cause disagreements among members.
2. Conflicts arise when theological interpretations or doctrinal beliefs differ within the congregation.
3. Miscommunication and unresolved personal grievances lead to tensions between members.
4. Generational differences in worship preferences, traditions, or priorities can create divisions.
5. Power struggles occur when individuals or groups compete for control or influence in the church.
6. Disputes over financial allocation, budgeting, or perceived mismanagement cause mistrust.
7. Cultural and socio-economic differences within diverse congregations may lead to misunderstandings.
8. Resistance to new programs, leadership, or worship practices creates divisions among members.
9. Unaddressed sin or unethical behavior can result in resentment and distrust in the community.
10. Gossip, slander, and breaches of confidentiality disrupt relationships and unity in the church.

10 Examples of Church Conflict

1. Worship Style Disputes
2. Doctrinal Differences
3. Leadership Clashes
4. Generational Tensions
5. Budgetary Disputes
6. Moral Failures
7. Ministry Competition
8. Cultural Differences
9. Debatable Personal Grievances
10. Resistance to Leadership

Practical Application:

• Examine Your Relationships: Identify open conflicts and commit to addressing them.
• Practice Active Listening: Show empathy and respect during conversations.
• Pray for Guidance: Seek God’s wisdom to navigate challenging situations.
• Final Thoughts: Turning Conflict into Growth
• While conflict is inevitable, it provides an opportunity for personal and spiritual growth when approached biblically. Jesus’ teachings in Matthew 5:23-24 and 18:15 encourage proactive reconciliation, humility, and forgiveness.

By following these principles, believers can overcome discord, foster unity, and reflect God’s love in their relationships and communities.

Key Verse to Remember:

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” (Matthew 5:9)

FAQs

What is the Bible’s way of resolving conflict?

The Bible’s way of resolving conflict focuses on peace, forgiveness, and humility. In Romans 12:18, we are encouraged to “live at peace with everyone” as much as possible. Jesus calls us to reconcile quickly, as in Matthew 5:23-24, where he emphasizes that reconciliation should take priority over even worship. The process involves taking responsibility, avoiding gossip, and seeking restoration.

What is the best way to resolve conflict in a church?

The best way to resolve conflict in a church is by following the biblical principles of direct communication, humility, and a focus on reconciliation. Begin by addressing the issue privately, as instructed in Matthew 18:15, and avoid allowing it to escalate. If necessary, involve leaders or mediators to ensure a fair and peaceful resolution. Practicing forgiveness and maintaining a spirit of humility are key to healing relationships.

What are the 7 steps of resolving conflict according to the Bible?

• Address the Issue Privately: Start by talking directly to the person involved (Matthew 18:15).
• Seek Reconciliation with a Witness: If the issue isn’t resolved, bring one or two others to help mediate (Matthew 18:16).
• Involve Church Leadership: If the conflict persists, involve the leaders of the church for a broader resolution (Matthew 18:17).
• Offer Forgiveness: Approach the situation with a forgiving heart (Ephesians 4:32).
• Be Humble: Remove your pride and approach the issue with humility (James 4:10).
• Pray for Guidance: Seek God’s wisdom and understanding throughout the process (James 1:5).
• Restore Peace: The ultimate goal is reconciliation, not victory (Romans 12:18).